"No wise man ever wished to be..." - Quote by Jonathan Swift

“By candle-light nobody would have taken you for above five-and-twenty.”

“I'm as old as my tongue and a little older than my teeth.”

“Pride, ill nature, and want of sense are the three great sources of ill manners; without some one of these defects, no man will behave himself ill for want of experience, or what, in the language of fools, is called knowing the world.”

“The trouble for the thief is not how to steal the chief’s bugle, but where to blow it.”

“It's like the sound of a chuckle in the darkness. The sense that some shattering and disarming simplicity is the real answer.”

“Getting old is like climbing a mountain; you get a little out of breath, but the view is much better!”

“The first half of life is learning to be an adult-the second half is learning to be a child.”

“Because we're old as sh*t. What do you want?”

“If they want to win right now, I'm all for it. That's all I said the whole time. If you want to wait five years, let me know. My legs aren't as young as they used to be.”