"I do something about the weather. I..." - Quote by George Carlin
I do something about the weather. I stay home.
More by George Carlin
“Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.”
“Whoever coined the term "Buyer Beware" was probably bleeding from the asshole.”
“If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know? If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words? Why is 'phonics' not spelled the way it sounds? How come abbreviated is such a long word?”
More on Humor
“I am a great eater of beef, and I believe that does harm to my wit.”
“I wrote 'Tom Sawyer' and 'Huck Finn' for adults exclusively, and it always distressed me when I find that boys and girls have been allowed access to them. The mind that becomes soiled in youth can never again be washed clean.”
“When I was a kid, I had two friends, and they were imaginary and they would only play with each other.”
More on Weather
“I turned my air conditioner the other way around and it got cold out. The weatherman said 'I don't understand it. It was supposed to be 80 degrees out today.' I said, oops”
“In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours.”
“There is something good in all weathers. If it doesn't happen to be good for my work today, it's good for some other man's today... and will come around for me tomorrow.”