"If politics were like sports, we could..." - Quote by Thomas Sowell
If politics were like sports, we could ask Israel to trade us Benjamin Netanyahu for Barack Obama. Of course, we would have to throw in trillions of dollars to get Israel to agree to the deal, but it would be money well spent.
More by Thomas Sowell
“Anyone who does not understand the utter cynicism of politics does not understand politics.”
“You have to have a sense of humor if you follow politics. Otherwise, the sheer fraudulence of it all will get you down.”
“To those who feel that their values are THE values, the less controlled systems necessarily present a spectacle of "chaos," simply because such systems respond to a diversity of values. The more successfully such systems respond to diversity, the more "chaos" there will be, by definition, according to the standards of ANY specific set of values- other than diversity or freedom as values. Looked at another way, the more self-righteous observers there are, the more chaos (and "waste") will be seen.”
More on Politics
“In politics we presume that everyone who knows how to get votes knows how to administer a city or a state. When we are ill... we do not ask for the handsomest physician, or the most eloquent one.”
“Oh, that [his Thanksgiving Message] is some of Seward's nonsense, and it pleases the fools.”
“As hideous and dumb as it sounds, I wouldn't be at all surprised by an invasion of Iraq on September II. I'll take a long shot bet on that.”
More on Satire
“Computers operate on simple principles that can be easily understood by anybody with some common sense, a little imagination, and an IQ of 750.”
“All men think that they're nice guys. Some of them are not. Contact me for a list of names.”
“Last week I saw a woman flayed, and you will hardly believe, how much it altered her person for the worse.”