"I know of nothing more laughable than..." - Quote by Voltaire

“All the ancient histories, as one of our wits say, are just fables that have been agreed upon”

“Heaven made virtue; man, the appearance.”

“A witty saying proves nothing, but saying something pointless gets people's attention.”

“So I want to thank the Pentagon, the Soviet Union and the military-industrial complex from the bottom of my heart. Without them, I could never have become the man I am today.”

“I've been very good for gun manufacturers.”

“Possessions are usually diminished by possession.”

“Taking all the round of professions and occupations, you will find that every man is the worse for being poor; and the doctor is a specially dangerous man when poor.”

“Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money.”

“I told my doctor I got water on my knee, he gave me a sponge and raised his fee!”