“With the proper training, I could've been an evil genius.”

“You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.”

“When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.”

“Language is a tool for concealing the truth. If we could read each other's minds, this would be a horror show.”

“When will all the rhetorical questions end?”

“Two lovely berries moulded on one stem;So, with two seeming bodies, but one heart.”

“One touch of nature makes the whole world kin.”

“For thou hast given me in this beauteous face A world of earthly blessings to my soul, If sympathy of love unite our thoughts.”