"Eating rice cakes is like chewing on..." - Quote by Dave Barry
Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.
More by Dave Barry
“Unless you live in Indonesia, there should be several malls within five miles of your home. It makes no difference whatsoever which one you go to: Under federal law, all malls in the United States must have the same 42 chain stores.”
“If the people in Europe are SOOOOOO smart, how come so many of them can't seem to locate the deodorant, huh?”
“Too many bugs and leeches and spiders and spiderwebs. Please spray the wilderness to rid the area of these pests.”
More on Humor
“What problems?" "Well for starters.. you're an evil duck killer.”
“He charged nothing for his preaching and it was worth it too.”
“I don't know why no one ever thought to paste a label on the toilet-tissue spindle giving 1-2-3 directions for replacing the tissue on it. Then everyone in the house would know what Mama knows.”
More on Food
“I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book . . . The recipes were to be the routine ones: how to make dry toast, instant coffee, hearts of lettuce and brownies. But as an added attraction, at no extra charge, my idea was to put a fried egg on the cover. I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right.”
“Griddle cakes, pancakes, hot cakes, flapjacks: why are there four names for grilled batter and only one word for love?”
“I'll bring my grits when I travel, because I get so hungry on the road.”