"Life is a do-it-yourself kit, so do..." - Quote by Phyllis Diller

“I'm from such an old family, it's been condemned.”

“I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap?”

“A stand-up comic is judged by every line. Singers get applause at the end of their song no matter how bad they are.”

“There is not a sprig of grass that shoots uninteresting to me.”

“Know your own happiness. You want nothing but patience- or give it a more fascinating name, call it hope.”

“The spectacle of Nature is always new, for she is always renewing the spectators. Life is her most exquisite invention; and death is her expert contrivance to get plenty of life.”

“No law can be sacred to me but that of my nature.”

“Satyagraha does not depend on outside help, it derives all its strength from within.”

“Character is far more important than intellect in making a man a good citizen or successful at his calling- meaning by character not only such qualities as honesty and truthfulness, but courage, perseverance and self-reliance.”