"Actually, there are people from all ove..." - Quote by Dave Barry

“The fact that Gene Weingarten and I and Bathroom Inventory are now part of some kind of Matrix of Poop strongly suggests that the Pulitzer is not what it once was.”

“Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask whether your country has been inhaling paint-thinner fumes.”

“I had no shoes and I pitied myself. Then I met a man who had no feet, so I took his shoes.”

“Religions are many and diverse, but reason and goodness are one.”

“Other people have qualities that may be better than your own. Let them express them.”

“Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language.”

“It's not how many followers you have, it's how many care. It's not width, it's depth. It's not how many impressions you get, it's how much attention you get.”

“We must want for others, not ourselves alone.”

“The moment we face it frankly we are driven to the conclusion that the community has a right to put a price on the right to live in it”