"English humor is hard to appreciate, though,..." - Quote by Mark Twain

“Education that consists in learning things and not the meaning of them is feeding upon the husks and not the corn”

“A jay hasnt got any more principle than a Congressman. A jay will lie, a jay will steal, a jay will deceive, a jay will betray; and four times out of five, a jay will go back on his solemnest promise.”

“There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.”

“Orchestras only need to be sworn at, and a German is consequently at an advantage with them, as English profanity, except in America, has not gone beyond a limited technology of perdition.”

“Cats invented self-esteem.”

“I'll bring my grits when I travel, because I get so hungry on the road.”

“There was something refreshingly and wildly musical to my ears in the very name of the white man's canoe, reminding me of Charlevoix and Canadian Voyageurs. The batteau is a sort of mongrel between the canoe and the boat, a fur-trader's boat.”

“How do you expect the Germans to revolt when they don't even dare walk on the grass?”

“The civilized nations--Greece, Rome, England--have been sustained by the primitive forests which anciently rotted where they stand. They survive as long as the soil is not exhausted. Alas for human culture! little is to be expected of a nation, when the vegetable mould is exhausted, and it is compelled to make manure of the bones of its fathers. There the poet sustains himself merely by his own superfluous fat, and the philosopher comes down on his marrow-bones.”