"Never put off till tomorrow what you..." - Quote by Mark Twain

“The physician who knows only medicine, knows not even medicine.”

“I bring you this stately matron named Christendom, returning bedraggled, besmirched, and dishonored from pirate raids in Kiao-Chow, Manchuria, South Africa, and the Phillipines, with her soul full of meanness, her pocket full of boodle, and her mouth full of pious hypocrisies. Give her soap and a towel, but hide the looking-glass.”

“No throne exists that has a right to exist, and no symbol of it, flying from any flagstaff, is righteously entitled to wear any device but the skull and crossbones of that kindred industry which differs from royalty only businesswise-merely as retail differs from wholesale.”

“By-and-by is easily said.”

“It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”

“Make me a beautiful word for doing things tomorrow; for that surely is a great and blessed invention.”

“I've seen George Foreman shadow boxing, and the shadow won.”

“What a dog I got. Last night he went on the paper four times - three while I was reading it.”

“I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner.”