"Sarcasm is the lowest form of humor..." - Quote by Benjamin Franklin

“A father's a treasure; a brother's a comfort; a friend is both.”

“The way to wealth is as plain as the way to market. It depends chiefly on two words, industry and frugality: that is, waste neither time nor money, but make the best use of both. Without industry and frugality nothing will do, and with them everything.”

“What is the use of a new-born child ?”

“A pear is a failed apple.”

“probably the greatest concentration of talent and genius in this house except for perhaps those times when Thomas Jefferson ate alone.”

“You can't have everything. Where would you put it?”

“I have not the pleasure of understanding you.”

“Joe Frazier is so ugly that when he cries, the tears turn around and go down the back of his head.”

“Written on her tombstone: "I told you I was sick.”