“With the proper training, I could've been an evil genius.”

“You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.”

“When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.”

“Language is a tool for concealing the truth. If we could read each other's minds, this would be a horror show.”

“When will all the rhetorical questions end?”

“Divers philosophers hold that the lips is parcel of the mouth.”

“You cannot call it love, for at your age the heyday in the blood is tame”

“For to define true madness,What is't but to be nothing else but mad?”