"Your dog thinks you're a god. Your..." - Quote by George Carlin

“Being a Dodgers fan led to my first Air Force court-martial, but that's another story.”

“You can't be the fastest gun in town forever. There comes a time when you're not the golden boy, and you have to go off somewhere and figure yourself out.”

“Electricity is really just organized lightning.”

“When you wake up in the morning, smile - and get it over with.”

“What exactly is "midair"? Is there some other part of air besides the "mid" part?”

“In jest, there is truth.”

“Thought subsides when you pet your dog or you have a purring cat on your chest. Even just watching an animal can take you out of your mind. It is more deeply connected with the source of life than most humans, and that rootedness in Being transmits itself to you. Millions of people who otherwise would be completely lost in the conceptual reality of their mind are kept sane by living with an animal.”

“The reason domestic pets are so lovable and so helpful to us is because they enjoy, quietly and placidly, the present moment.”

“Derangement is the only possible explanation for owning a cat, an animal whose preferred mode of communication is to sink its claws three-quarters of an inch into your flesh.”