"The owner of a Florida massage parlor..." - Quote by George Carlin

“I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist.”

“Have you ever started a path? No one seems willing to do this. We don't mind using existing paths, but we rarely start new ones. Do it today. Start a path. Even if it doesn't lead anywhere”

“Eventually, alas, I realized the main purpose of buying cocaine is to run out of it.”

“Laughter without a tinge of philosophy is but a sneeze of humor. Genuine humor is replete with wisdom.”

“For the benefit of those of you who have real jobs and are not involved in the news business, I should first explain that . . .”

“I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs.”

“There is a law in each well-ordered nationTo curb those raging appetites that areMost disobedient and refractory.”

“The whole idea of equal justice under law is completely incompatible with the idea of judges deciding cases according to "empathy".”

“But I wonder where we will land if trial judges begin deciding that the fact that a man has committed an atrocious crime is proof sufficient that he is not responsible for his acts.”