“You have to give 100 percent in the first half of the game. If that isn't enough, in the second half, you have to give what's left.”

“It is a disturbing conundrum that true free will cannot exist without the possibility of suicide. Then again, it ain't over 'til it's over!”

“I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk!”

“Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life.”

“Whatever you do, you should do it with feeling.”

“How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child!”

“The love that follows us sometime is our trouble, which still we thank as love.”

“Evermore thanks, the exchequer of the poor”

“Now, my masters, happy man be his dole, say I; every man to his business.”

“In friendship, as in love, we are often happier through our ignorance than our knowledge.”

“Some there be that shadows kiss; Such have but a shadow's bliss.”

“Science is organized knowledge. Wisdom is organized life. Football is four 15-minute quarters. Plus timeouts and commercials.”

“The Golcondas were considered incomparably the best team in Southern India ... [But] we defeated [them] by 9 goals to 3. On succeeding days we made short work of all other opponents, and established the record, never since broken, of winning a first-class tournament within fifty days of landing in India.”

“Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an ever smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose”