"I was armed to the teeth with..." - Quote by Mark Twain

I was armed to the teeth with a pitiful little Smith & Wesson's seven-shooter, which carried a ball like a homopathic pill, and it took the whole seven to make a dose for an adult. But I thought it was grand. It appeared to me to be a dangerous weapon. It had only one fault - you could not hit anything with it.
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More by Mark Twain

“Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand.”
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“Citizenship is what makes a republic - monarchies can get along without it.”
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More on Humor

“I always like to know everything about my new friends, and nothing about my old ones.”
— Oscar Wilde
“I don't mind making jokes, but I don't want to look like one...”
— Marilyn Monroe
“The only thing worse than quoting me, is not quoting me”
— Oscar Wilde

More on Weapons

“Bombing is not especially inhumane. War itself is inhumane and the bombing plane, which is used to paralyse industry and transport, is a relatively civilised weapon. 'Normal' or 'legitimate' warfare is just as destructive of inanimate objects and enormously so of human lives.”
— George Orwell
“The weapons of war must be abolished before they abolish us.”
— John F. Kennedy
“I'm absolutely sure that there are weapons of mass destruction there and the evidence will be forthcoming. We're just getting it just now.”
— Colin Powell