"I gather from a lawyer that there..." - Quote by Alphonse Karr

“Love in marriage should be the accomplishment of a beautiful dream, and not, as it too often is, the end.”

“We can invent only with memory.”

“If men knew all that women think, they would be twenty times more audacious.”

“A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries.”

“I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap?”

“Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.”

“There are certainly not so many men of large fortune in the world, as there are pretty women to deserve them.”

“I was born modest; not all over, but in spots.”

“I took a course in speed reading. Then I got Reader's Digest on microfilm. By the time I got the machine set up, I was done.”