"I don't have a fear of heights...." - Quote by George Carlin

“The highly motivated people in society are the ones causing all the trouble. It's not the lazy unmotivated folks sitting in front of a TV eating potato chips who bother anyone.”

“One time. In 1965. August, for about an hour, I was both fine AND dandy at the same time. But nobody asked me how I was.”

“People can't seem to get it through their heads that there is never any healing or closure. Ever. There is only a short pause before the next "horrifying" event. People forget there is such a thing as memory, and that when a wound "heals" it leaves a permanent scar that never goes away, but merely fades a little. What really ought to be said after one of these so-called tragedies is, "Let the scarring begin.”

“An honest politician is an oxymoron.”

“A lot of times when they catch a guy who killed twenty-seven people, they say, He was a loner. Well, of course he was a loner; he killed everyone he came in contact with.”

“Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana”

“Nobody knows what death is,nor whether to manit is perchance the greatest of blessings,yet people fear it as if they surely knewit to be the worse of evils.”

“Life is the dance between what you desire most, and what you fear most”

“In this country [England] it is good to kill an admiral from time to time, to encourage the others. The reference is to Admiral John Byng, who was executed in 1757 for failing to prevent the French from taking Minorca.”