"Cloud nine gets all the publicity, but..." - Quote by George Carlin

“Things I wonder about the FBI's list of the "Ten Most Wanted" criminals: When they catch a guy and he comes off the list, does number eleven automatically move up? And does he see it as a promotion? Does he call his criminal friends and say, "I made it, Bruno. I'm finally on the list"?”

“I've never seen a homeless guy with a bottle of Gatorade.”

“I find that an entertainer is quite content to sit still, and I think an artist always has a little motion, always going somewhere. May not know where it is, but there is some sort of unnamed destination. There is some pulling, some movement. So I just found myself in that category according to my own analysis.”

“Life really is like a grindstone, in that it will either grind you down or polish you up.”

“All public facts are to be individualized, all private facts are to be generalized.”

“Life is composed of lights and shadows, and we would be untruthful, insincere, and saccharine if we tried to pretend there were no shadows.”

“Self Pity is the most miserable party to go to, because, in case you haven't noticed, you're the only one who is there.”

“With freedom, books, flowers, and the moon, who could not be happy?”

“To attain something desired is to discover how vain it is; and…though we live all our lives in expectation of better things, we often at the same time long regretfully for what is past. The present, on the other hand, is regarded as something quite temporary and serving only as the road to our goal. That is why most men discover when they look back on their life that they have the whole time been living ad interim, and are surprised to see that which they let go by so unregarded and unenjoyed was precisely their life, was precisely in expectation of which they lived.”