"And this should go without saying. That's..." - Quote by George Carlin
And this should go without saying. That's why I'm going to say it: Drinking and driving don't mix. Do your drinking early in the morning and get it out of the way. Then go driving while the visibility is still good.
More by George Carlin
“The radio ad "Hi, I'm Jeff Healey from the Jeff Healey Band. Don't drink and drive. I don't". Well, I hope you don't drive sober either Mr. Healey. You're blind for God's sake!”
“When you visualize the recent past, do you see it as being somewhere over on the left?”
“I was trying to get out of the night clubs and was thinking maybe I'll go to the colleges now; that's where you can speak your mind.”
More on Humor
“Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.”
“You've got a goal in life. I've got a goal. Now all we need is a football team.”
“If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will. If you're right 90% of the time, why quibble about the remaining 3%? In Africa some of the native tribes have a custom of beating the ground with clubs and uttering spine chilling cries. Anthropologists call this a form of primitive self-expression. In America we call it golf.”
More on Drinking
“The water was not fit to drink. To make it palatable, we had to add whisky. By diligent effort, I learned to like it.”
“It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, one's present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason”
“I seldom took a drink on the set before 9 a.m.”