"I'm not offended by all the dumb..." - Quote by Dolly Parton

“I'm comfortable in my own skin, no matter how far it's stretched. Ha ha.”

“I've done everything every fat person ever has. I've tried every diet.”

“I've always been a freak and different, oddball even in my childhood and my own family, so I can relate to people who are struggling and trying to find their true identity. I do not sit in the seat of judgment. .. I love people for who they are. We're all God's children.”

“I don't consider myself an intellectual. And this is not one of my aims. But I admire intellectual people.”

“I try to think of myself as a chic fishing grandpa aesthetically.”

“Every man needs a blind eye and a deaf ear, so when people applaud, you'll only hear half of it, and when people salute, you'll only see part of it. Believe only half the praise and half the criticism.”

“My way of joking is to tell the truth. That's the funniest joke in the world.”

“I was born because it was a habit in those days, people didn't know anything else.”

“Babies are equipped at birth with a number of instinctive reflexes and behavior patterns that cause them to spend their first several years trying to kill themselves. If your home contains a sharp, toxic object, your baby will locate it; if your home contains no such object, your baby will try to obtain one via mail order.”