"Some say our national pastime is baseball...." - Quote by Erma Bombeck

“The woman who says, 'My kids are all speaking to one another and they love us' is a psychopathic liar.”

“Never underestimate what it takes to watch someone you love in pain.”

“In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced in television.”

“The rabble estimate few things according to their real value, most things according to their prejudices.”

“It is not inequality which is the real misfortune, it is dependence.”

“Comfort is the only thing our civilization can give us.”

“For your popular rumour, unlike the rolling stone of the proverb, is one which gathers a deal of moss in its wanderings up and down.”

“it is not wise to keep the fire going under a slander unless you can get some large advantage out of keeping it alive. Few slanders can stand the wear of silence.”

“There are two things for which animals are to be envied: they know nothing of future evils, or of what people say about them.”