"I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or..." - Quote by Erma Bombeck
I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent.
More by Erma Bombeck
“not all bears have their own television series. Some of them are unemployed wild animals.”
“Everyone I talked to was a recording-the bank, the elevator, your office, the school, a wrong number. You used to be able to call a wrong number and get a person.”
“Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.”
More on Humor
“I learned the importance of a man's chair early in life. I learned that he may love several wives, embrace several cars, be true to more than one political philosophy, and be equally committed to several careers, but he will have only one comfortable chair in his life. I learned it will be an ugly chair. It will match nothing in the entire house. It will never wear out.”
“The hardest exercise for most of us fat people is that one where we push our chairback from the dinner table.”
“Jesse Helms wants me to move to the right, Lowell Weiker wants me to move to the left, and Teddy Kennedy wants me to move back to California.”
More on Consumerism
“I bought Windows 2.0, Windows 3.0, Windows 3.1415926, Windows 95, Windows 98, Windows ME, Windows RSVP, The Best of Windows, Windows Strikes Back, Windows Does Dallas, and Windows Let's All Buy Bill Gates a House the Size of Vermont.”
“What is called 'capitalism' might more accurately be called consumerism. It is the consumers who call the tune, and those capitalists who want to remain capitalists have to learn to dance to it.”
“Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.”