"One certainty when you travel is the..." - Quote by Erma Bombeck

“It was a bitter moment for us. We weren't two mature parents. We were just two kids playing grown-up. We still needed Mommy and Daddy's permission, blessings, and money to survive.”

“My mother phones daily to ask, "Did you just try to reach me?" When I reply no, she adds, "So, if you're not too busy, call me while I'm still alive," . . . and hangs up.”

“A child needs your love most when he deserves it least”

“Travel is fatal to bigotry.”

“It has been said that a Scotchman has not seen the world until he has seen Edinburgh; and I think that I may say that an American has not seen the United States until he has seen Mardi Gras in New Orleans.”

“I was very much disappointed in the Atlantic Ocean.”

“There is no city in the United States in which I can get a warmer welcome and fewer votes than Columbia, Ohio.”

“Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage.”

“Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.”