"Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight..." - Quote by Dave Barry
Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said "CIGARETTES CONTAIN FAT.
An image illustrating the quote: "Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said "CIGARETTES CON..."
More by Dave Barry
“The president, apparently, was so totally unaware of where his foreign policy was that he had to appoint a distinguished commission to help him locate it, and when the commissioners called him in to testify, he told them, essentially, that he couldn't remember what it looked like. Now, if Richard Nixon had claimed something like that you would at least have had the comfort of knowing he was lying. You could trust Nixon that way. But with this president, you have this nagging feeling that he's telling the truth.”
“Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.”
“The Republicans have a high Beady-Eyed Self-Righteous Scary Borderline Loon Quotient, as evidenced by Phyllis Schlafly, Pat Robertson, the entire state of Utah, etc.”