"I was going with someone for a..." - Quote by Rita Rudner

“I'm going to start water skiing someday...as soon as I can separate it from being dragged by a boat.”

“Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.”

“We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet.”

“It is lack of love for ourselves that inhibits our compassion toward others. If we make friends with ourselves, then there is no obstacle to opening our hearts and minds to others.”

“Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary.”

“Your dog thinks you're a god. Your cat thinks the dog's an asshole.”

“When men break up they want to remain friends. Why? Why can't they just get lost?”

“When I want to end a relationship I just say, 'You know, I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have your children.' Sometimes they leave skid marks.”

“A more interesting question is not 'Why did they break up?' but 'Would they have gotten back together?' ... There's always a chance we'd work together again, but I can't see us touring. I just see us making records.”