"I jogged for three miles once. It..." - Quote by Rita Rudner
I jogged for three miles once. It was the worst three hours of my life.
More by Rita Rudner
“I was going with someone for a few years, but we broke up. It was one of those things. He wanted to get married, and I didn't want him to.”
“I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose.”
“I have no organisational skills. All my energy goes into worry - worrying takes a lot of energy.”
More on Humor
“What Time Is It? You Mean Now?”
“I have some speakers up here, thank God, because last night I didn't have them and I was telling jokes and I had no idea which joke I was telling. So I told jokes twice. I even told that one twice.”
“I’m a high-tech low-life. A cutting edge, state-of-the-art bi-coastal multi-tasker and I can give you a gigabyte in a nanosecond!”
More on Exercise
“[On why she doesn't exercise:] If I tried to jog with these boobs, I'd end up with two black eyes.”
“Use now and then a little Exercise a quarter of an Hour before Meals, as to swing a Weight, or swing your Arms about with a small Weight in each Hand; to leap, or the like, for that stirs the Muscles of the Breast.”
“Exercise and temperance can preserve something of our early strength even in old age.”