"Humor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of..." - Quote by Erma Bombeck

“People shop for a bathing suit with more care than they do a husband or wife. The rules are the same. Look for something you'll feel comfortable wearing. Allow for room to grow.”

“There would have been more 'I love you's' and more, 'I'm sorry's'.”

“Cleaning the house while the children are home is like shoveling while it's still snowing.”

“If the people in Europe are SOOOOOO smart, how come so many of them can't seem to locate the deodorant, huh?”

“I wonder that no criminal has ever pleaded the ugliness of your city as an excuse for his crimes.”

“When I say "dogs", I'm talking about dogs, which are large, bounding, salivating animals, usually with bad breath. I am not talking about those little squeaky things you can hold on your lap and carry around. Zoologically speaking, these are not dogs at all; they are members of the pillow family.”

“Often a certain abdication of prudence and foresight is an element of success.”

“In combat, spontaneity rules; rote performance of technique perishes.”

“Experience, as a desire for experience, does not come off. We must not study ourselves while having an experience.”