“When the media ask George W. Bush a question, he answers, 'Can I use a lifeline?'”

“I learned that by being entertaining you make a connection with another person.”

“Golf is one of the few sports where a white man can dress like a black pimp and not look bad.”

“Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.”

“I think it's great when stories are dark and strange and weirdly personal.”

“Oh! it offends me to the soul to hear a robust periwig-pated fellow, tear a passion to tatters, to very rags, to split the ears of the groundlings.”

“I can counterfeit the deep tragedian;Speak and look back, and pry on every side,Tremble and start, at wagging of a straw,Intending deep suspicion.”

“The virtue you would like to have, assume it is already yours, appropriate it, enter into the part and live the character just as the great actor is absorbed in... the part he plays.”

“Benvolio- "By my head, here come the Capulets." Mercutio- "By my heel, I care not.”

“Some report a sea-maid spawn'd him; some that he was begot between two stock-fishes. But it is certain that when he makes water his urine is congealed ice.”

“Free from gross passion or of mirth of anger constant spirit, not swerving with the blood, garnish'd and deck'd in modest compliment, not working with the eye without the ear, and but in purged judgement trusting neither? Such and so finely bolted didst thou seem.”

“Nor age so eat up my invention.”

“Ideas are the very coinage of your brain.”

“Where art thou, Muse, that thou forget'st so long / To speak of that which gives thee all thy might?”

“Pardon, gentles all, the flat unraised spirits that have dared on this unworthy scaffold to bring forth so great an object.”

“Praise us as we are tasted, allow us as we prove.”

“A great while ago the world begun,With hey, ho, the wind and the rain;But that's all one, our play is done,And we'll strive to please you every day.”