"Somebody figured it out- we have 35..." - Quote by Earl Wilson

“An exhaustive study of police records shows that no woman has ever shot her husband while he was doing the dishes.”

“Middle Age - later than you think and sooner than you expect.”

“There's only one kind of tax that would please everybody - one that nobody but the other guy has to pay.”

“Do not read the newspapers.”

“The ladies here probably exchanged looks which meant, 'Men never know when things are dirty or not;' and the gentlemen perhaps thought each to himself, 'Women will have their little nonsense and needless cares.'”

“I delight to come to my bearings,... not to live in this restless, nervous, bustling, trivial Nineteenth Century, but stand or sitthoughtfully while it goes by.”

“Wherever in any society there are too many laws, it is a sure sign that that society will soon die. If you study the characteristics of India, you will find that no nation possesses so many laws as the Hindus, and national death is the result.”

“The ongoing migration of persons to the United States in violation of our laws is a serious national problem detrimental to the interests of the United States.”

“The laws of the Universe are responding to me.”