"Today's accent may be on youth, but..." - Quote by Earl Wilson

“To sell something, tell a woman it's a bargain; tell a man it's deductible.”

“A bachelor is a guy who leans toward women - but not far enough to lose his balance.”

“He's an honest man - you could shoot craps with him over the telephone.”

“You want to mess up the minds of your children? Here's how - guaranteed! Rear them in a legalistic, tight context of external religion, where performance is more important than reality. Fake your faith. Sneak around and pretend your spirituality. Train your children to do the same. Embrace a long list of do's and don'ts publicly but hypocritically practice them privately... yet never own up to the fact that its hypocrisy. Act one way but live another. And you can count on it - emotional and spiritual damage will occur.”

“My parents wanted me to go to school.”

“Of course you don't want your kids swearing. But remember how fun it was to cuss when you were in the first grade?”

“Too many people grow up. That's the real trouble with the world, too many people grow up. They forget. They don't remember what it's like to be 12 years old. They patronize, they treat children as inferiors. Well, I won't do that.”

“Twenty-four years ago I was strangely handsome; in San Francisco in the rainy season I was often mistaken for fair weather.”

“I had one or two steady girlfriends in high school, but then in college, it was three, four... I went crazy. At one point I had three separate girlfriends, running around mad.”