"There's one thing I always wanted to..." - Quote by Groucho Marx

“All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.”

“Money cannot buy you happiness, and happiness cannot buy you money. That might be a wise crack, but I doubt it.”

“Remember men, you are fighting for the ladies honor, which is probably more than she ever did.”

“I have now the gloomy prospect of retiring from office loaded with serious debts, which will materially affect the tranquility of my retirement.”

“I will never retire unless I have to.”

“I am never going to have anything more to do with politics or politicians. When this war is over I shall confine myself entirely to writing and painting.”

“The fastest way for a politician to become an elder statesman is to lose an election.”

“I must seem like an ostrich who forever burries its head in the relativistic sands in order not to face the evil quanta.”

“Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.”