"This would be a better place for..." - Quote by Groucho Marx

“Every time someone turns on a TV, I go in the other room and read.”

“My favourite poem is the one that starts 'Thirty days hath September' because it actually tells you something.”

“I'm gonna put extra blankets, free, in all your rooms, and there'll be no cover charge.”

“If there is any one duty which more than another we owe it to our children and our children's children to perform at once, it is to save the forests of this country, for they constitute the first and most important element in the conservation of the natural resources of this country.”

“I love little children too but I don't cut off their heads and stick them in vases.”

“How are children supposed to learn to act like adults, when so much of what they see on television shows adults acting like children?”

“The kids are old enough now - I just want to let them be kids. I don't want to comment on them too much. They're at an age where I just want to let them be kids.”

“All I can say is [kids] have turned out to be terrific young women. We were concerned mostly about whether they'd develop an attitude, right?”

“One [expert] said, 'Always have a baby sitter who is acquainted with your children.' If they were acquainted with my children, they wouldn't sit!”