"Winny would spend all of his time..." - Quote by Steven Wright

“I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.”

“I broke my arm trying to fold a bed. It wasn't the kind that folds.”

“I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it's like a circus in my head.”

“A lot of shelter dogs are mutts like me.”

“My fat never made me less money.”

“Humorists of the 'mere' sort cannot survive. Humor is only a fragrance, a decoration.”

“I have heard of a minister, who had been a fisherman, being settled in Bridgewater for as long a time as he could tell a cod froma haddock. Generous as it seems, this condition would empty most country pulpits forthwith, for it is long since the fishers of men were fishermen.”

“Let every man practise the trade which he best understands.”

“I get a feeling about where a teammate is going to be. A lot of times, I can turn and pass without even looking.”