"It's quite true I'm not drinking anymore;..." - Quote by W C Fields

“There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.”

“Where there is a will, there's prosperity around the corner.”

“Never give a sucker an even break.”

“My method is to take the utmost trouble to find the right thing to say, and then to say it with the utmost levity.”

“My son would walk to the refrigerator-freezer and fling both doors open and stand there until the hairs in his nose iced up. After surveying $200 worth of food in varying shapes and forms, he would declare loudly, 'There's nothing to eat!'”

“I'm searching for loopholes.”

“I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.”

“Drink to me. Drink to my health. You know I can't drink any more.”

“How to Drink Like a Gentleman: The Things to Do and the Things Not To, as Learned in 30 Years' Extensive Research.”