“Business is an establishment that gives you the legal, even though unethical, right to screw the naive-right, left, and in the middle.”

“There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink it.”

“Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.”

“Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive.”

“Anyone who hates children and animals can't be all bad.”

“Lord, I could not endure a husband with a beard on his face! I had rather lie in the woolen.”

“There is no slander in an allowed fool, though he do nothing but rail.”

“I will not be sworn but love may transform me to an oyster”

“Be great in act, as you have been in thought.”

“Is he on his horse? O happy horse, to bear the weight of Antony!”

“Greatness knows itself.”

“I have very poor and unhappy brains for drinking: I could well wish courtesy would invent some other custom of entertainment.”

“I drink and smoke and I am two hundred percent fit.”

“The water was not fit to drink. To make it palatable, we had to add whisky. By diligent effort, I learned to like it.”

“Too busy with the crowded hour to fear to live or die.”

“He decided to give up his large ambition of knowledge and action for any narrow craft or profession, aiming at a much more comprehensive calling, the art of living.”

“Wisdom will never let us stand with any man on an unfriendly footing. We refuse sympathy and intimacy with people, as if we waited for some better sympathy or intimacy to come. But whence and when: Tomorrow will be like today. Life wastes itself while we are preparing to live.”