"I don't believe in dining on an..." - Quote by W C Fields

“Fields' reply: He'd think I was a sissy.”

“Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket.”

“When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.”

“I like hearing myself talk. It is one of my greatest pleasures. I often have long conversations all by myself. Sometimes I am so clever I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.”

“I was also going to give a graduation speech in Arizona this weekend. But with my accent, I was afraid they would try to deport me.”

“Learn from the mistakes of others - you won't live long enough to make them all yourself. He's opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer him the position.”

“Some simple dishes recommend themselves to our imaginations as well as palates.”

“Cut that pizza into six slices instead of eight, I ain't that hungry.”

“I like refried beans. That's why I wanna try fried beans, because maybe they're just as good and we're just wasting time. You don't have to fry them again after all.”