"Was I in here last night and..." - Quote by W C Fields

“It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.”

“In every big city there is always one surefire laugh, and that lies in hanging some piece of idiocy upon the people of a nearby city or town.”

“A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.”

“I was almost put out of business by a well-meaning corpse.”

“I'm an energy vampire. I just suck off everybody's energy. But I give it back.”

“What I know for sure is that if you can survive 11 days in cramped quarters with a friend and come out laughing, your friendship is the real deal. I know ours is.”

“When you have money in hand,only you forget who are you .But when you do not have any money in your hand,the whole world forget who you are.It's life.”

“To be satisfied with what one has; that is wealth. As long as one sorely needs a certain additional amount, that man isn't rich.”

“There is no fortune so strong that money cannot take it.”