"Why buy a product that it takes..." - Quote by Steven Wright

“It's very interesting, the joke comes first and then the wording comes within five seconds, maybe ten seconds. My thing is to get the joke across in as few words as possible. However, sometimes a word that's not really needed does help the rhythm of it. It's a gut feeling.”

“I like to reminisce with people I don't know.”

“I like to talk about lint and coasters, the expansion of the universe and maybe McDonald's. I'm completely turned off by the idea of politics.”

“I'm the rap version of Dave Chappelle. I'm not sayin' I'm nearly as talented as Chappelle when it comes to political and social commentary, but like him, I'm laughing to keep from crying.”

“An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.”

“I could be stranded in any town in the United States with ten cents and within an hour make $20 with the shell game.”

“In three years, every product my company makes will be obsolete. The only question is whether we will make them obsolete or somebody else will.”

“Great companies are built on great products.”

“I do think there is a lot of potential if you have a compelling product and people are willing to pay a premium for that. I think that is what Apple has shown. You can buy a much cheaper cell phone or laptop, but Apple's product is so much better than the alternative, and people are willing to pay that premium.”