Men Quotes

“To be popular one must be a mediocrity." "Not with Women," said the duchess, shaking her head; "and women rule the world. I assure you we can't bear mediocrities. We women, as someone says, love with our ears, just as you men love with your eyes, if you ever love at all." "It seems to me that we never do anything else," murmered Dorian.”

“Men become old, but they never become good.”

“Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat.”

“I delight in men over seventy. They always offer one the devotion of a lifetime.”

“The way a man looks at himself in a mirror will tell you if he can ever care about anyone else.”

“We women adore failures. They lean on us.”

“A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman makes a fool of him in twenty minutes.”

“There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about.”

“Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it's quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.”

“My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.”

“Men in high levels of government seldom surf.”

“Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.”

“When men break up they want to remain friends. Why? Why can't they just get lost?”

“Men don't mature. Marry a younger one.”

“Men are very confident people. Even a sixty-year-old man with no arms thinks he could play in the Super Bowl if he had to.”

“Don't try to teach men how to do anything in public. They can learn in private; in public they have to know.”

“Not one man in a beer commercial has a beerbelly.”

“Men who drink herbal teas are seldom serial killers.”

“A man will go to war, fight and die for his country. But he won't get a bikini wax.”

“All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. They don't understand them, and they don't want to get near them. I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.”

“Men don't live well by themselves. They don't even live like people. They live like bears with furniture.”

“Men do not like to admit to even momentary imperfection. My husband forgot the code to turn off the alarm. When the police came, he wouldn't admit he'd forgotten the code... he turned himself in.”

“My parents were glad to see that my new husband looks like a 'regular guy'-no earring or anything. But really I think a man with an earring is better prepared for marriage. I mean, he's already experienced pain and bought jewelry.”

“Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?" Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"”

“Most of the men sitting in first class on an airplane have really boring jobs.”